Bill 'Awkins

     “'As anybody seen Bill 'Awkins?”
        “Now 'ow in the devil would I know?”
    “'E's taken my girl out walkin',
       An' I've got to tell 'im so--
          Gawd--bless--'im!
       I've got to tell 'im so.”

    “D'yer know what 'e's like, Bill 'Awkins?”
        “Now what in the devil would I care?”
    “'E's the livin', breathin' image of an organ-grinder's monkey,
       With a pound of grease in 'is 'air--
          Gawd--bless--'im!
       An' a pound o' grease in 'is 'air.”

    “An' s'pose you met Bill 'Awkins,
       Now what in the devil 'ud ye do?”
    “I'd open 'is cheek to 'is chin-strap buckle,
       An' bung up 'is both eyes, too--
          Gawd--bless--'im!
       An' bung up 'is both eyes, too!”

    “Look 'ere, where 'e comes, Bill 'Awkins!
       Now what in the devil will you say?”
    “It isn't fit an' proper to be fightin' on a Sunday,
       So I'll pass 'im the time o' day--
          Gawd--bless--'im!
       I'll pass 'im the time o' day!”