Beliefs I Don't Have the Courage to Test

Ideas I hold that might be wrong, but I'm afraid to find out. These are the beliefs that feel too risky to challenge because they're foundational to how I live.

About Personal Capability

Belief: I have unique insights that others would find valuable.
Why I won't test it: What if my ideas are actually obvious or wrong? What if I'm not as smart as I think I am? The risk to my self-concept feels too high.

Belief: I could be successful at almost anything if I really tried.
Why I won't test it: Actually committing fully to something and failing would prove my limitations. It's safer to maintain the illusion of untapped potential.

Belief: My work has lasting impact.
Why I won't test it: Discovering that my contributions are forgettable or replaceable would undermine my sense of purpose.

About Relationships

Belief: My close friends genuinely enjoy my company.
Why I won't test it: What if they spend time with me out of obligation or habit? Some uncertainties are better left unresolved.

Belief: I'm a good partner/parent/friend.
Why I won't test it: Asking for honest feedback might reveal that I'm not as considerate or supportive as I believe.

Belief: People respect my opinions.
Why I won't test it: Learning that others see me as naive or misguided would be devastating to my confidence.

About Life Choices

Belief: I'm on the right path in life.
Why I won't test it: Seriously questioning my major life decisions might require changing everything, and the cost of being wrong feels unbearable.

Belief: My career choices align with my values.
Why I won't test it: Discovering that I've been compromising my principles for money or status would require difficult changes.

Belief: I have enough time to accomplish my goals.
Why I won't test it: Calculating whether my ambitions are realistic given my remaining lifespan might lead to crushing realizations about mortality and missed opportunities.

About Personal Growth

Belief: I'm constantly improving and learning.
Why I won't test it: What if I've been stagnating? What if I peaked years ago and have been in decline since?

Belief: My habits and routines are optimal for my well-being.
Why I won't test it: Examining my daily patterns might reveal that I'm living in ways that make me less happy or healthy than I could be.

Belief: I handle stress and challenges well.
Why I won't test it: Facing a truly difficult situation might reveal that my coping mechanisms are inadequate.

About Values and Principles

Belief: I would act ethically under pressure.
Why I won't test it: What if I'm just as corruptible as everyone else? What if my moral principles crumble when tested?

Belief: I'm not prejudiced or biased.
Why I won't test it: Deep examination of my unconscious biases might reveal that I'm not as fair-minded as I believe.

Belief: My political and social views are well-reasoned.
Why I won't test it: Genuinely engaging with opposing viewpoints might show that my beliefs are based on emotion or tribal identity rather than logic.

About Future Outcomes

Belief: Things will generally work out for me.
Why I won't test it: Calculating the actual probabilities of my hopes and plans succeeding might reveal that I'm being unrealistically optimistic.

Belief: I'll be satisfied with my life when I'm older.
Why I won't test it: Talking to older people who made similar choices might reveal common regrets I'm heading toward.

Belief: The work I'm doing now will matter in the long run.
Why I won't test it: Looking at historical examples of similar efforts might show that most of what feels important today is forgotten tomorrow.

About Health and Mortality

Belief: I'll live a long, healthy life.
Why I won't test it: Getting comprehensive health screenings might reveal problems I'd rather not know about until I have to.

Belief: I'll have time to fix my health problems later.
Why I won't test it: Learning about the real timeline for when damage becomes irreversible might require immediate lifestyle changes I'm not ready to make.

Belief: My family medical history won't significantly affect me.
Why I won't test it: Genetic testing might reveal predispositions that would change how I live my life.

The Meta-Belief

Belief: It's better to test beliefs than to live with uncertainty.
Why I won't test it: This entire list proves that I don't actually believe this, and examining that contradiction might require admitting that I'm fundamentally a coward about truth-seeking.

The courage to test beliefs requires being willing to rebuild your life on new foundations. Sometimes ignorance is a luxury we're not ready to give up.

@article{yotam2025beliefs-i-dont-have-the-courage-to-test,
  title   = "Beliefs I Don't Have the Courage to Test",
  author  = "Yotam, Kris",
  journal = "krisyotam.com",
  year    = "2025",
  month   = "May",
  url     = "https://krisyotam.com/notes/on-myself/beliefs-i-dont-have-the-courage-to-test"
}